Tattered, Not Broken
by TortoiseNHare64
Summary: Takes place when Cas is turned human during the show. Cas brings home an injured kitten to take care of and Dean is initially displeased. But as he sees how happy Cas is with it, he starts to warm up to the kitten. Fluff with light angst and a happy ending. Rated for language.


"Cas...what is that?"

"I believe mankind refers to it as a 'cat', Dean."

"No shit, I - I mean," Dean let out a frustrated sigh as he circled around the desk to draw nearer. "Why the fuck is there a cat in the bunker?"

"I found it. It needed a home."

"What, so you, so you thought that _this_ would be a good place for it?"

Cas blinked. "Yes."

Dean shut his eyes tightly to control himself. Taking a deep breath, he steeled himself before continuing, "Cas, this is the _worst_ place to have a pet."

"I do not agree."

Dean opened his mouth but Sam quickly cut in with, "Cas, I get where you're coming from, and I totally agree with wanting to help out a lost kitten. But Dean has a point. We're hunters. We're gone most days with no idea when we'll come back, _if_ we will come back, and it wouldn't be responsible to adopt this kitten. Besides, are you sure it didn't have an owner?"

Cas shook his head. "It was abandoned in an alley. There were monsters lurking nearby and I couldn't just leave it. It's blind in one eye, Sam. It needs us."

Sam exchanged a glance with Dean. "Maybe we should try and find it a different home, Cas. Somewhere it'll be safe and properly cared for."

"We have enough shit to deal with, man. We can't have a damn pet," Dean agreed, turning his back on Cas and the kitten to go grab a beer from the fridge. "I want that thing gone by tomorrow. Find it a home away from here."

 **XXXXX**

Cas did not find it a different home. In fact, when Dean woke up groggy from a night of drinking and walked into the kitchen, he was confused and slightly miffed that said kitten was curled up on a makeshift bed of old t-shirts that didn't fit him or Sammy anymore. The t-shirt pile was tucked in a corner by the fridge and the little kitten was sleeping soundly. It had a bowl of water next to its bed. Sighing deeply, Dean grabbed a cup of coffee and downed it before pouring himself another cup.

It was going to be a long day.

Sam came into the kitchen then and Dean gave him a side eye.

"Dean -"

"Do you know how expensive pets are? We can barely afford cheap motel rooms for hunts and gas to get us there. Not to mention enough beer and food to feed the three of us. _Now_ you're going to put us even deeper into the hole by keeping this thing?"

"Cas and I asked around town before you woke up. Nobody has room for a cat around here, Dean. And all of the local shelters already have their work cut out for them."

"Then we bring it to the next town or the town after that until some cute little girl gets smitten with it."

"Dean -"

"Sammy, we can't," Dean pleaded. "We're not pet people, okay? This thing is _not_ staying."

Sam frowned at him but didn't say anything.

 **XXXXX**

Later that day, Dean and Sam were doing research on a case together when Dean blinked and looked up from his computer. "Why isn't Cas helping us?"

Sam cleared his throat and didn't move his gaze away from the laptop - a clear sign that he was hiding something. "I don't know. Maybe he's off doing human things? Like having a life?"

Dean scoffed. "Cas doesn't have a life." Sighing, he stood up. "Want anything while I'm up?"

Sam shook his head and Dean left the room.

Moving to the kitchen, Dean stopped just a bit short of the entrance-way. He could hear Cas talking softly. Sweetly. Peering around the corner, Dean spied Cas with his back to Dean, holding something in his arms.

"You'll like them," Cas was saying. "From what I've seen, Sam is great with animals and will definitely help take care of you. Dean, well...he's a bit rough around the edges at first but I think he'll come around. He could use another friend. You two are a lot alike."

Before Dean could wonder about what Cas meant by that, the once-angel-now-turned-human turned slightly so that Dean could see the little kitten curled up in Cas's arms, purring softly. Cas was scratching it under its chin. For the first time, Dean took in the little kitten's features. It had one good, green eye and light brown fur. Its back, left paw had a tuff of white coloring around it so that it looked as if the kitten was wearing a sock.

 _This is a bad idea_ , Dean thought to himself with an inward sigh as he stepped back and away from the kitchen. _I should put my foot down and throw the damn thing out while Cas and Sam are out or something._

But despite common sense trying to push its way through his skull, Dean turned and headed back to Sam.

His brother quirked an eyebrow when Dean sat down at the table with a grimace.

"No Cas?"

Dean sighed and put his head in his hands, ignoring Sam's satisfied smirk.

"Not a word, Sammy. Not a word."

 **XXXXX**

Dean and Sam had agreed that if expenses for the kitten started to grow to noticeable amounts, then they would get rid of it. In the meantime, Dean never openly informed Cas that he could keep the kitten in the bunker. Dean would just give a gruff _hmmph_ whenever Cas or Sam played with the kitten, held it, or fed it. Dean had no idea where the damn thing went to the bathroom but he hoped that it wasn't anywhere near his bedroom.

About two weeks after Cas had initially brought it home, Dean was aimlessly typing away at his laptop while totally _not_ watching Cas and the kitten from the corner of his eye. They hadn't had a case in a few days and nothing suspicious had come up on the radar. Dean counted it as a brief blessing but he knew that quiet times like this never lasted long. Usually they were followed up by whatever apocalypse was due to hit the planet this time. Dean wished they had a case.

Dean glanced at Cas and the cat. Cas had obtained a ribbon attached to a stick that he was currently spinning around slowly on the floor so that the kitten could chase it. The kitten seemed to be a lot healthier than when Cas had first brought it home. Its fur was no longer matted and it seemed to have a bit more coordination of its limbs despite being blind. It had even started gaining a healthy dosage of weight on its tiny body.

Dean was totally _not_ somewhat captivated by the view of Cas and the kitten.

Dean looked up from watching the kitten to examine Cas's face. He looked more relaxed and pleased than he had in _weeks_. Cas was smiling, which was a sight that Dean rarely saw these days. Cas just looked so at _peace_.

Dean looked back at his computer and suddenly felt that familiar surge of guilt. It was his fault that Cas had lost his grace and was now human. It was his fault that Cas couldn't have an almighty existence with few worries. It was his fault that Cas and Sam couldn't live some happy life with a partner and a pet and a white picket fence -

"Dean."

Dean blinked but kept his gaze on the screen for another minute before slowly looking up at Cas.

He wore a frown instead of a smile.

"What's wrong? Is it about the cat?"

Dean shook his head, shutting down his computer.

"Then what is bothering you?"

Dean wouldn't look at Cas until he felt more than saw a gentle hand place itself a few inches away from his own on the table. Dean didn't meet Cas's eyes. Instead he bit his lip before he replied.

"I - we can't provide for this thing the way others could, you know? We can't shower it with toys or give it the best quality food that's probably expensive. We can't promise that we'll even come back from missions. And then what? The bunker isn't the best environment for a cat to grow up in. There's not a lot of sunshine or things to watch outside and if we die on a hunt or saving the world then this thing will be stuck here and probably starve to death and, and..." Dean shook his head. "It deserves a happier way of life."

"How do you know he's not happy here?"

Dean scoffed, looking back at the cat on the ground that was curled up peacefully. "It doesn't know any better. It doesn't know what it _could_ have."

"Dean."

Dean closed his eyes but looked up when Cas moved his hand to Dean's shoulder. Dean couldn't look away from Cas's eyes.

"I think he sees this place as home, Dean. Sure, it might be a bit broken and tattered but so is he."

Dean tried to swallow past the lump in his throat. He knew they weren't talking about just the cat. As Cas gave him a gentle smile, Dean felt something rub against his ankle. Looking down, he saw that the kitten was brushing against his leg and purring softly.

"Maybe you're all he needs to feel safe," Cas whispered. When had he gotten so close to Dean? His hand was still warm and comforting on Dean's shoulder.

Leaning down, Dean gently picked up the kitten and let it shuffle about on his lap until it got comfortable and curled up for a nap.

"Cas, I -"

"You don't have to say anything," Cas replied softly with a genuine smile. His hand reached down and he gently ran it over the kitten's small frame. Cas's hand so close to Dean's legs made the Winchester's face color for reasons he didn't quite understand.

They stayed like that for a few moments, Cas hovering close to Dean's body, and Dean blushing at the proximity while holding the kitten gently on his lap.

"What's his name?"

"Kittycat."

Dean's groan was audible and Cas laughed.

 **Author's Note: Please leave a review if you enjoyed this fic! Reviews encourage me to post more of my works for viewers like you to enjoy.**


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